I love new friendships. All of them.
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Monday, September 17, 2007
where is the love?
"Yesterday it happened. Reality set in. I am back.
Living, actually living life with Big Jack, Small Jack, Wendy, Cynthia, Crystal, Bus, Annie, Ocean... will have to wait ten months. My heart aches for them, for them to know, truly know, how much I love them... which I have come to realize is impossible, my heart aches for them to know the Father like I do, for them to find their worth in Him alone.
I miss their innocent laughter, their silly jokes, the way they LOVED me, them ordering me food that I still am unsure of, the way I belonged there, the comfort of walking those streets, the way I lived life so intentionally... and the way I saw the Lord's face in it all. The way my sweet Wendy encouraged me daily, the way Jack said "Lana you beautiful today" every time I walked through the door, the way Kenny never failed to make me laugh, the way Ocean challenged me... but most importantly the way LOVE poured out into everything I did, every word I said...
I need Him to comfort me, but not dare allow me to get comfortable.
I need life here to be more meaningful, to pour into those around me, to love like I did in Hong Kong... to pour out His love like I did on my students. I desire to love the people around me NOW... but not lose the amount of love I have for those in Hong Kong. It comes down to this: I need love. To feel loved. To love others. To be consumed by love, to love where I am today, to love where I am walking, to love each and every face that I see, to love the things I am learning... I need love. He is love. I need Jesus."
--from my journal this morning.
It all clicked. What I miss the most is LOVE. I never experienced love like I did while I was in Hong Kong. Love for my team, love for my students. My prayer the entire time I was there was for every face I came in contact with to see the love of Christ in me, for his love to be poured out in EVERYthing that I did. That has not been a DAILY prayer since I got back...until today...
Living, actually living life with Big Jack, Small Jack, Wendy, Cynthia, Crystal, Bus, Annie, Ocean... will have to wait ten months. My heart aches for them, for them to know, truly know, how much I love them... which I have come to realize is impossible, my heart aches for them to know the Father like I do, for them to find their worth in Him alone.
I miss their innocent laughter, their silly jokes, the way they LOVED me, them ordering me food that I still am unsure of, the way I belonged there, the comfort of walking those streets, the way I lived life so intentionally... and the way I saw the Lord's face in it all. The way my sweet Wendy encouraged me daily, the way Jack said "Lana you beautiful today" every time I walked through the door, the way Kenny never failed to make me laugh, the way Ocean challenged me... but most importantly the way LOVE poured out into everything I did, every word I said...
I need Him to comfort me, but not dare allow me to get comfortable.
I need life here to be more meaningful, to pour into those around me, to love like I did in Hong Kong... to pour out His love like I did on my students. I desire to love the people around me NOW... but not lose the amount of love I have for those in Hong Kong. It comes down to this: I need love. To feel loved. To love others. To be consumed by love, to love where I am today, to love where I am walking, to love each and every face that I see, to love the things I am learning... I need love. He is love. I need Jesus."
--from my journal this morning.
It all clicked. What I miss the most is LOVE. I never experienced love like I did while I was in Hong Kong. Love for my team, love for my students. My prayer the entire time I was there was for every face I came in contact with to see the love of Christ in me, for his love to be poured out in EVERYthing that I did. That has not been a DAILY prayer since I got back...until today...
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